the_wanlorn | Dear Gmail:

I'd really appreciate it if you would work for me. I kind of need to read those email messages you are so kindly telling me that I have.

I understand that the server is having some down time, or being maintained, or eating live babies with a spork. But I need you to understand that I need.

To check.

My email.

See, I have classes bright and early tomorrow morning. So I need to know if the Academy of Math and Suicide sent me anything that I would need to know for tomorrow.

Thanks for your time and for not having this letter directly routed to the Trash folder.

Sincerely,
Your Loyal Email Checker,
Nire