In Which I Talk About Things Made By People on the Internet

[the_wanlorn]

Over the past couple months, my consumption of things sold by people on the internet increased a thousandfold. So here. Have four CD reviews and one book review, not necessarily in that order.


soleta owns cleoinda's m15m book, so of course I stole it last time I visited her. And then I told her I stole it, which I guess moves it from stealing to borrowing. But whatever.

I don't remember all of the movies that were in the book, so I'm going to assume that the ones I don't remember are because the parody (is that what these fall under?) wasn't as good as the ones I do. Because looking the book up on Amazon takes a lot of effort. Shut up.

Overall, I was not expecting this to be funny. As far as I'm concerned, going from internet-thing to book is equivalent to going from TV show to movie: it never ends well.

So how did Movies in Fifteen Minutes fair? Imagine if cleolinda had someone do hardcore this-is-not-funny-fix-it editing on the M15Ms she posts online. Multiple times. So they got every unfunny bit and made her change it.

Yeah.

The LotR trilogy was by far the best. In fact, unless I'm specifically trying to list the movies in the book (uhh, Matrix, Gladiator, Braveheart, HP #1, Titanic, ...Spider-man... ...ummmm Independence Day! aaaand... uh... LOOK, IT'S SUPERMAN *runs away*), my mind associates it with LotR. Seriously.

And, yeah, I could go through every movie and tell you about them and how funny they were. Or I could just, you know, move onto the CDs. Like the cool person I am.



Right, so, once upon a time there was a girl named cadhla and she wrote an LJ post about song. And there was a girl named the_wanlorn who went "WHOA, A PARROT? THE ONLY REMAINING SPEAKER OF A LOST LANGUAGE? THAT'S SO FUCKING COOL I MIGHT JUST EXPLODE FROM THE SHEER AWESOMENESS OF IT."

And so, she went off and researched a lot about it and read up on it and accidentally learned an embarrassing amount of the language. As one does. And she waited impatiently for the CD to come out so she could buy it just for that song.

(This is not an uncommon occurrence. I have a CD that I bought in the 90s purely for one song on it and, in fact, I still haven't listened to the rest of the CD. And no one will ever ever get me to admit that song is "Kiss From a Rose". Ever.)

And then, holy shit, Thirteen came out, and I hied myself to CDBaby to buy it. Just in time for a roadtrip down to Baltimore to visit soleta!

There is a large possibility that I had that song on repeat for the entire eight hour drive and knew it by heart by the end. But we're not going to talk about that.

I pretty much evenly LOVE and just like the songs on here. SO LET'S TALK ABOUT THE SONGS, SHALL WE?

"Thirteen" is rocky and upbeat and wonderful and has a similar sound to "Black Horse & the Cherry Tree", which I love to death.

"Emerald Green" and "My Love Was Like the Moon" are both pretty and nice to sing along with, but not anything spectacular.

"Apprentice" is wonderful and haunting and a lovely look at Inara and I love it love it love it and oh is it gorgeous.

"Six String Love" is AWESOME. I wandered into work one day singing it and got the eye from one of the guys who lurk in the conference room during lunch jamming with their guitars.

"Red Right Hand" is everything I love about Nick Cave, but in a register I can sing along with.

"Mal's Song" is wonderful and sad and awesome and the very end with a chorus singing the chorus is unbelievable.

"Persephone" made me go asjdkfl;ajsdf and fall in love with the myth all over again.

"Siren Song", "Butterfly Soul", and "Erased" are, once again, nice to sing along with, but didn't captivate me.

I THINK WE ALL KNOW HOW MUCH I AM IN LOVE WITH "STRANGE MESSENGER".

"Companion" is... look, you know how sometimes you break up with someone and it's an amicable breakup and you still hang out with them, and sometimes it's rough and you're all angry and upset all the time, and sometimes it just ends for you and hearing about the guy/girl makes you all wistful and sad and maybe a little tearful? That last is my relationship with Doctor Who so I'm not much a fan of this song.

And that's that CD.



Back when I first heard about "Strange Messenger", I went and found vixyish's website to see if maybe the CD was already available. Well, no, it wasn't. But I did find the CD of the filk group she used to belong to, Escape Key.

So I trucked on over to CDBaby and listened to the clips to see if I liked this person's singing.

And I didn't.

At all.

In the slightest.

I thought the tunes were lame and the lyrics were crap and the voice was nothing special and I was so so so disappointed. The song I hated the most was "Girl That's Never Been". It had such a promising title, but it was complete crap.

Fast forward to when Thirteen came out. I bought it, and bought Shadowbeast too, because, uh. Look, I'm sure you have your little peculiarities. One of mine is that if I own one CD by someone, I have to own all of them. This is why I can never buy anything by Talis Kimberley; the inability to get everything she's ever done will make my head explode.

Anyway, it just kind of languished on my hard drive for a while. And then I listened to it. And now, less than a month later, I can sing along with every song* and sing 80% of them by myself, and am well on my way to knowing the harmonies, too.

And, of course, my favorite song, the one that I know forward and backwards, the one that took me less than a day to memorize, is "Girl That's Never Been".

Sometimes, I think I do these things just to spite myself.

In any case, I was a little more than shocked when this turned out to be my favorite out of the two CDs. Then I remembered that rule about a musician's first CD always being their best, and stopped thinking about it.

So, let's talk about the two that I don't much like. "Shadowbeast" and "The Moon is Mine", while lovely to sing along with, don't hold my interest. If you came up to me right now and asked me to sing a snatch of each of them, I'd fumble and not be able to even hum the tunes.

"No Hurry" is next up, in that I like it, but I'm not in love with it. The tune is nice and rolling like a wagon, the chorus is memorable and sure I could sing that bit for you. But nothing about it really grabs me and makes me go HAY HAY HAY LEARN THIS NOW.

I like "Into the Fire" more than "No Hurry" but, uh, I don't really have much to say about it.

"The Collars" is AWESOME. I've not read the short story it's based on yet, because it is longish and, uh, okay I don't have a good reason, I just haven't. The chorus is a thing to behold, the tune is catchy, and it's just a great song.

"Ladies Don't Do Those Things" is so fucking awesome I don't even have words. The best bit is the part in the chorus that goes "Ladies don't do those things I know they don't" all in one lovely slide down and then up of slurred notes, with a break at the end that's just asjdkflj;aslkdf. This has become one of my walking songs. It wasn't my favorite at first; it was actually pretty far down on the list, but it's grown to be SO FUCKING AWESOME IN MY HEAD I CAN'T EVEN DJASKLFJAKL;SDF

"Merlin" is amazing. The story is excellent and the tune, oh lord the tune. Especially the last chorus with the harmony. The first time I heard it I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. Every time it makes me stop and go "Oo la".

"The Girl That's Never Been" is like rum and chocolate chip cookies. My love for it will never die. My roommate's hate for it will also never die, since I sing it all the time as I'm wandering about.

And basically, if you don't buy this CD, or at least make the appropriate noises when I force you to listen to it, I'll gut you like a fish. >:(

---

*"But Erin," those of you who know me are saying. "You can sing along with any song the first time you hear it." Yes, I know, but with this I can sing along without the mumbling and getting caught offguard when the line doesn't go the way I'm expecting it to.

---

Pretty Little Dead Girl breaks that rule about the first CD always being the best. This is because it follows a better rule: the live CD is always the worst.

I only listened to the CD all the way through... well, a lot, but that's because it came looong before Stars Fall Home. But now that I have both, I just smooshed them together, with all the songs on SFH first and the ones that I don't hate on PLDG last.

Songs that did not make the cut:

• "This is My Town" because the version on SLH is better.
• "Sycamore Tree" because the version on SLH is a lot better.
• "Pretty Little Dead Girl" because the version blah blah blah
• "River Lies" because certain male singers cough in the middle and the version on SLH does not have that.
• "Vampire Slayer Blues" because I don't like it for my own reasons.

Songs that made the cut because I did not not like them:

• "Phantoms of Summer" which is pretty to sing with but nothing special.
• "Snapshots" because I like the parts that go "The river is wide, the river is deep, the river will rock your soul to sleep" and "The river is dark, the river is (c)old, the river is bitter, black, and (c)old".

Songs that I like but do not love:

• "Maybe It's Crazy" purely because it's so low I can't sing half the notes. Never say that I am not a fickle fan.
• "Modern Mystic" because... I don't know. I'm just not in love with it. But it's good enough and catchy enough and.. whatever.

Songs that are oddly enough my favorites, period, even though they're on my least favorite CD:

• "I Am (The Doppleganger's Song)" because it is gorgeous and wonderful and asjdfkljsl;akdfja;sdf
• "Fly Little Bird" because I have this thing for a capella songs where there are no instrument mimics, just voices singing and being wonderful and oo la.

Seriously, I would buy it just for those two songs. And if I ever lose the mp3s I ripped, I'm going to have to buy it again, because certain douchebag!cats scratched the CD.



HELLO, ALLOW ME TO FLAIL FOR A LITTLE BIT. SDAJFKLJASKL;DJFKL;JASDFKL;AS

The way things go when I get new music is that first I learn the words well enough to sing along with the music. Then I learn the words to the majority of the songs so I can sing them when I don't have music. Then I'll learn to sing along to the harmonies for a select few that I particularly love.

Um, yeah. I can do that to all the songs on this CD. It took me less than a month all told. Yes, even "Sycamore Tree". No, I don't know what this says about me, and I don't want to know.

If I were a mean person, I would make fun of the cover art, but I'm not a mean p- YOU IN THE BACK, STOP LAUGHING AT ME. DON'T THINK YOU CAN HIDE. I SEE YOU THERE, WEE, AND I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU UP. >:(

So, yes. I fell in love with "River Lies" first. And then I fell out of love with it and into like, because I just didn't have enough room in my heart for all the love that the rest require.

"Downhome Aphrodite" and "Still Catch the Tide" came next, and are the two that I can most reliably be found singing wherever I am, because I am still so starry-eyed in love with them. Looooove.

"Follow Me Down" is glorious for walking, and the bodhran in it makes me want to start playing mine again.

"Paper Moon" is lovely and twangy and *________*. Also, the food at the Paper Moon restaurant is delicious, but that has nothing to do with this.

"This is My Town" I've never fallen in love with, but it's like that friend that kind of lurks in the background and is always there when you need someone.

"Dorothy" is actually the second song I fell in love with, and learned, and drove everyone batshit insane singing over and over and over again. The love has mellowed now, but it's still there.

"FOUR COLOR LOVE" IS AMAZING AND GLORIOUS AND IF I COULD HAVE IT IMPLANTED IN MY HEAD SO I NEVER STOPPED HEARING IT I WOULD.

"In This Sea" inspires a hatred in me so grand that I always skip over it in my playlist. Because taking it out would be too much effort to waste on such a crap song.

"Sycamore Tree" is an unbelievably pile of vocal spaghetti that works.

"TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME" IS GORGEOUS AND I HUM IT AT NIGHT WHEN I'M ALMOST ASLEEP.

"Country Song" is hilarious and I love singing it and daydreaming about SLiTHER.

"Evil Laugh" is adorable. Just adorable. DINOSAURS. WASH'S DINOSAURS. OH MAN.

"Earthquake Weather" is amazing. Even though it starts my heart racing at the beginning because the siren sounds suspiciously similar to the siren in "Silent Hill" and that game is FIRMLY CONDITIONED ME to panic and look for monsters when it starts up.

My favorite part of "Pretty Little Dead Girl" is mimicking the different voices in the story part. IT IS WONDERFUL AND I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD ME DOING IT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHEN I CAN'T SLEEP.

And, basically, if you do not buy this then we can no longer be friends. Because it is that amazing and wonderful and as;dljkflasjdfklsdf


IN CONCLUSION, PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET ARE AWESOME AND THIS IS 2500 WORDS LONG SO I SHOULD STOP TALKING NOW..

Comments

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

I ordered m15m back when it came out, because I just had to know. I also thought that the transition from Internet to physical medium would detract from the overall value of the book. And I think some of her online posts (especially Troy and Van Helsing) are funnier than the ones in the book. But the book is still hellaciously funny. I think Spidey, Independence Day, and LOTR are the best parts of the book. Totally worth it.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

LOTR was seriously amazing. I mean, maybe that's because I'm an epic Tolkien fangirl and only a major [other things] fangirl.

I actually liked Independence Day the least, although that's probably because it was the only movie in the book that I haven't seen.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Nothing wrong with Tolkien fangirling. It is a good thing. There should be more Tolkien fangirls out there for me to ogle whose company I would enjoy.

"What's taters, precious?"

[tfabris.livejournal.com]

Wow... just... wow.

Thank you SO much.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Oh, on the list of things that I forgot to say because I was trying to get all of my verbal diarrhea thoughts out before I forgot them (see how well that worked?) is that your guitar playing is fucking amazing and makes me flail about with glee like a mad scientist who just discovered a new plague to release on the unsuspecting world. "Strange Messenger" had me thisclose to signing up for guitar lessons so I could move beyond knows-three-cords-that-aren't-even-power-cords and be able to play it. And then I came to my senses and remembered that being a codemonkey intern doesn't pay enough for that sort of thing.

You guys are my new people-I-want-to-be-when-I-grow-up-hit-30.

[tfabris.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks!

I'm happy with the guitar work on the album as a whole. I wish I could have had more time for Strange Messenger actually. I had to record that all in just one or two short sessions, and didn't have time to go back and change or fix anything. As a result, I feel like I'm repeating myself too much over the course of the song. I was, however, quite proud of my heretofore undiscovered Spanish streak. :-)

Guitar lessons are cheap, by the way.

Hey, I've got a feature on the web site where it puts up a random blurb on each page refresh. Can I "blurb" you? And if so, what name should I use?

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, that makes it even more impressive!

Not around Boston, alas. :( Although I could go over to the conservatory and harass someone there into giving me lessons for cheap... >:)

Blurb away! Erin or Erin McLaughlin works for me.

[tfabris.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Done! :-)

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Oh that is so cool! You're welcome and thank you. :DDDDD

[technoshaman.livejournal.com]

Hey, I had a question on that.... did you use your regular folk guitar for "Strange Messenger", or did you borrow something with nylon strings? 'cause it sure sounds like a classical guitar.... seriously good stuff.

[tfabris.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Strange messenger has two guitars: The Taylor six string steel for the background guitar, and a nylon string classical for the lead guitar. Same arrangement as Persephone. I also used that same nylon string guitar on Butterfly.

[tfabris.livejournal.com]

It wasn't a borrwed guitar by the way. I purcased a good nylon string guitar at Trading Musician. I don't remember its brand name. I bought it specifically for recording Persephone.

[gfish.livejournal.com]

There is very little reason to read the original Collars short story. If I wasn't dedicated to the preservation of all information, no matter how crappy and embarrassing, I would have taken it down years ago. :)

[scifantasy.livejournal.com]

*shrug* I liked it, for whatever that's worth.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Ahaha I'm the same way. :D Rest assured that the odds of me ever getting around to reading it are slim; my to-read pile of physical books and short stories is so backed up that I won't be getting to any of the things I added this month until, oh, sometime around 2032.