I don’t understand anything anymore

[the_wanlorn]

So, I figured out why my stomach was feeling all clenchy last week. Two things, only one of which I plan on talking about in here. It's skool. Saturday morning, it was feeling better. Not anywhere near okay, but noticeably better. Sunday morning it was a lot better and totally okay by the end of the day. This morning, it was back with a vengeance and getting worse. So, yeah, the major reason is skool. Just the thought of it stresses me out unbelievably. It's ridiculous, too, since this year is basically a joke. Well, compared to MassAcademy it is. But, still… I think it's partly because Mum's already going into how I better get al A's cuz if she could, then I could. And if I don't then I'm stupid and a disappointment and a failure. And I already know that I'm not going to get all A's because it's not worth it to me to study all the time and go for extra help and stuff. I hate needing help. But it's allllll good cuz I have given up on skool. I just bombed my CS midterm and I am a failure at calc and, well, I already know that I suck bum at history because I hate it. But, yeah. I'm so going to end up back at Douglas next term and I'm not gonna get into college and I'm gonna end up working at BK for the rest of my life and live in a cardboard box by the side of the road and people will drive by and laugh at me and everyone will hate me cuz I'm a stupid loser. Can you save me from this world of mine?

Comments

[piratezim.livejournal.com]

as a CS major i feel obliged to body slam all exams regarding CS into the proverbial mat.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Oh good, I can pass this by you then...

Does a CS midterm closed notes, paper and pen/pencil make ANY sense to you? Like, how can you write code and know if it's gonna work if you don't have a computer to check it with?

Or am I just insane?

[piratezim.livejournal.com]

the test is to see if you know syntax for the particular language, assuming that is the goal of the course. If you know all the keywords, and can write it in UML, it should be easy.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Oh, well in that case, maybe I didn't actually bomb it....

[piratezim.livejournal.com]

what language was the test? c++? java? FORTRAN?

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Scheme.

See, it's not even a vaguely difficult language, I just SUCK MONKEY BALLS when I don't have a computer in front of me.

[piratezim.livejournal.com]

draw a picture of a computer on your test then next time.

Um...

[wiggin8.livejournal.com]

Um... You don't have to live in a cardboard box, you can live with me. And I won't hate you. And you're not stupid. Loser? I'll get back to you on that one :-D. I guess anyone who dates me has to be pretty loser-ish :-p. I love you! And happy anniversary!

Re: Um...

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

Yeah you will cuz you don't like stupid people so you'll be like, "Pssssssssh I'm around all these wicked smart people now I'll go find someone less stupid."

[godsaveyourmom.livejournal.com]

Bah CS sucks! No other way to say it.

But cheer up Nire! After the year's over you can leave history and calc and whatever else you hate/aren't good at behind.

[the-wanlorn.livejournal.com]

=-O I can leave life behind?

[iplayinthedirt.livejournal.com]

you can leave life behind when you go to maine and spend the summer in a cabin on the waterfront.

maine the escape from life?

[quix0te.livejournal.com]

[iheartmunkies.livejournal.com]

You can always move your cardboard box to the front of my apartment in the projects because its hard to live off a teacher's salary.... if I even graduate because of my damn senior project. In that case, can I live in your cardboard box with you?